Some people were not brought up in an environment conducive for them to cultivate a healthy focus for their life, but with the right intention and guidance, we absolutely can change anything about our lives we desire. The challenge is that when our environment provides for traumatic experiences, our brain’s circuitry develops in response to those events. That means people who experience abuse think differently than those who do not. This often prohibits the abused from knowing how to shift their energy and perspective toward a creative, healthy focus for their life because they’re typically accustomed to reacting to their environment instead of planning, thinking, building healthy relationships, or controlling their
Emotions such as fear, anxiety, and panic are more active in the minds of those who
experience abuse and trauma than those who do not. This can leave people feeling
helpless, hopeless, and without options. Here are some things you can do to offset that and begin creating a focus for your life:
Step 1. Figure out what you enjoy, what comes natural for you, and what could you see yourself doing 5 or 10 years from now that brings a smile to your face. Learn to pay close attention to your inner voice. Your inner voice is there to guide you and to provide you answers to whatever questions you provide it. All you have to do is learn to listen to it. Start by meditating. Focus on your breathing and just observe yourself internally. Guidance will reveal itself to you.
Record your revelations in a notebook.
Step 2. Once you figure out the answers to the above questions, ask yourself, “How can I build a life doing "the things" that were revealed to me?” This question now has the potential to become your central focus. For me, I knew I wanted to be a therapist since I was 10 years old. Had I learned to focus in on that thought and feeling instead of living a life of survival, I could have made a plan to move in the direction of that as a career. I could have focused on my education early on instead of getting caught up in survival mode. But that would have required someone teaching me how to nurture and trust my inner voice. That’s what I’m suggesting you do for yourself now.
Step 3. Nurture what your inner voice reveals to you. Find the necessary mentors, take the necessary college classes, build out the idea that's inside of you, ponder how your work can improve society, write books on the topic, become the authority in that subject area, and take advantage of all opportunities that reveal themselves to you.
Step 4. Create something. Create your life.
Step 5. Focus on your legacy. How do you want to be remembered? What legacy do you want to leave? The ideas you come up with will probably change over the years. That’s okay. At first, I didn’t really know what legacy I wanted to leave. I just knew some things I wanted to accomplish. I started out with achieving my bachelors degree and years later that turned into writing a book, then another book, then a blog, creating a website, then a literacy program, and now it’s a coaching program where I teach people how to maximize their super powers and deliberately create their lives by reprogramming their subconscious mind using hypnosis and other methods I used to improve my own life.
It took me a while, but I eventually realized I wanted to be the BEST at all I did. Being
a person of excellence became the platform from which I did everything because I
decided I wanted to be a great example to society, especially foster youth. I wanted to show them what IS possible. When we focus on creating a legacy that will live on long after we are gone, it creates a sense of healthy pride in ourselves. You can never go wrong when your focus in life also benefits humanity.
All you have to do to get started in life is just start with an intention and life will
unfold for you. As you learn to oblige your spirit, it will guide you. Is your inner voice guiding you toward a life of teaching, modeling, acting, hair, make-up, auto mechanics, computers, aviation, tech, love for humanity, entrepreneurship, leadership, dance, construction, plumbing, or something else? Once identified, you will be well on your way to figuring out the focus for your life. But beware of distractions; control your focus and your thinking. Remember, conscious thinking doesn’t naturally occur for humans. We must focus our mental efforts toward deliberate thinking in order to think smartly
Read non-fiction books to learn how to think. Always put new knowledge into your brain to create new neuropathways. Talk with as many people as possible who are smarter than you are. This is how you will learn to integrate ideas, think abstractly, muse, imagine, and reason. As you increase awareness of your talents and interests, use that momentum to progress your life and the big picture called your future.
Holding a GRAND vision for you!
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